Stari dobri CITATI

[FreaK_]

ajmo neku mudrost da pokrenemo !!!!......ja licno gotivim latinske izreke ali i citati -poznati i oni drugi- ulaze u obzir.....

omiljena stvar......"ne zalim za stvarima koje sam ucinio....samo za onima koje nisam"........Oscar W. naravno

[Boris]

Kakve su ti misli takav ti je zivot!

ne mogu se setiti, ali jedan od monaha.

[Babek]

"The death of one man is tragedy.The death of million is a statistic.""
- Joseph Stalin

[ypow]

Maybe nisam pogodio temu u centar, ali evo nekih potpisa sa nekih foruma, gde su uglavnom citati. Nayvao sam ih "mudre reči glupih ljudi" :D
Sex is just like hacking. You get in, you get out. And you pray you left nothing behind!

If I have to listen to what an AssHole has to say, I'll rather FART !!

"Tude stvari ne smeš da diraš,
još manje da ih otimaš od vlasnika.
Zato odmah vrati pištolj ovom
pijanom coveku, iako on tvrdi
da ce njime da ubije nekoga."

"Covek moze da pogresi, ali ako stvarno hoces da zabrljas, iskoristi kompjuter", izvuceno iz Murphyeve knjige pravila

If your computer's broken because you are running Windows, don't just fix it, 'nix it.

1f u c4n r34d th1s u r34lly n33d t0 g37 l41d

while (!asleep()) sheep++;

Saying that Java is nice because it works on all OS's is like saying that anal sex is nice because it works on all genders.

U svakoj lazi ima 1/2 istine. To znaci da se u onoj polovini koja je laz nalazi 1/2 istine. Daljom primenom matematicke indukcije zakljucujemo da jednacina tezi ka 1, tj. da je u pitanju cista istina.

Sada je tren velikih odluka...
bolje je zivjeti sto godina kao milijunas nego sedam dana u bijedi!!!

"Bog je mrtav"-NICE
"Nice je mrtav"-BOG

-Odracuonogakomijedrpiorazmaknicu.
-Ne rxdi mi txstxturx, kxd god hocu dx ukucxm "x" onx ukucx "x".
-Ko kaaz e da ja neuummem da kuuca m.
-Piše "Insert disk 3", a jedva sam i ova dva ugurao u drajv
-Postoje samo dve osobe kojima verujem, jedna sam ja, a druga nisi ti

Radije cu zaliti zbog necega sto sam ucinio, nego zbog toga sto nesto nisam ucinio.
Bolje biti spreman, pa nemati priliku, nego da ti se prilika ukaze a da nisi spreman.

Taksisti su otkrili toplu vodu , provalili su da sa vladom mozes samo na silu da razgovaras, poskupe takse -blokada puta , ubiju taksistu -blokada puta , premlati kinez petoricu taksista - blokada puta ... dakle za sve isto .

Ako nisi gde si, nisi nigde.


Radi ono što voliš.
Voli ono što radiš.


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Poceo sam da držim dijetu, izbacio sam pice i dobru hranu, i za 14 dana sam izgubio dve nedelje. Džo E. Luis

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Nije tesko biti fin, ali je mnogo lakse biti STOKA.

Voze se kolima:elektricar,mehanicar i programer.Kola odjednom stanu i ni makac
elektricar:crko nam akumulator
mehanicar:otisla nam pumpa za gorivo
programer:a da probamo da izadjemo, pa da ponovo udjemo!!

Ako si ti woona ja sam igla za strikanje.

Q: How many IBM CPUs does it take to do a logical right shift?
A: 33. 1 to hold the bits and 32 to push the register.

Sto se tice kompova ovo treba reci svakome ko ne zna:
brzo
dobro
jeftino
izaberite dva!

-I know UNIX, PASCAL, C, FORTRAN, COBOL, and nineteen other high-tech words.

You know 'that look' women get when they want sex? Me neither.

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 600SL convertible.

Dobra vila mi je ispunila 2 zelje. Treci put nisam mogao.

With a PC, I always felt limited
by the software available.
On Unix, I am limited only by my knowledge.
--Peter J. Schoenster

PROGRAMER-neko ko resava problem za koji niste ni znali da ga imate, na nacin koji ne razumete

When I was 17, I drank some very good beer I drank some very good beer, I purchased, with a fake ID. My name was Brian McGee, I stayed up listening to Queen When I was 17 (Homer Simpson)

Ima li tragicnijeg coveka od onoga ko je,najzad,dobio sve ono sto je nekada zeleo?

Da parafraziram coveka kod koga sam radio 6 godina:
-Zelis da budes srecan?
-kupi pivo i sedi ispred dragstora.I eto ti licne srece.
-ako zelis da uspes u zivotu moras malo i da se namucis.

Treba biti srecan jer si se rodio TI a ne neko drugi šansa za to je 1 naprema 1000000 zato budi srecan uživaj u životu...

I think there is more chanse of Micheal Jackson getting a job in kindergarden than you finding the 3 girls you are looking for !!!

Naucio sam...
Da je važnije biti ljubazan nego biti u pravu

We are going to upgrade your brain
...searching...
...searching...
sorry no brain found.

Marljiv poput lijenjivca, brz poput puža i mudar kao indijska gljiva

S_Kid:
Besmisleno... to je skrnavljenje picke kao predmeta obozavanja!

Ja nisam šizofrenicar, a nisam ni ja.

*+*-*Zoki, zasto si tajanstven kao japanski sumrak na vrhu izvitoperene ljubichice??*-*+*

Reincarnation:
Life sux and then you die. And then life sux again...

SOFTWARE IS LIKE SEX
IT'S BETTER WHEN IT'S FREE

(to_be || !to_be) == question

Našim politicarima treba samo podignuti biste - golubovi ce obaviti ostalo!

Time is our best teacher, but unfortunatly it kill's all of his students!

Bolje bit' malo lud, neg' malo pametan

nije vazno biti prvi...
vazno je stici pre drugog!!!

Sta Vas najvise nervira na Internetu?
Pretrazhivanje!
Ko da pokushash da napunish naprstak vodom koristeci hidrant!

PENTIUM - Produces Enormous Numbers Through Incorrect Understanding of Mathematics

What I hear, I forget. What I see, I remember. What I do, I understand. What I screw up, I master.

"- Da li biste za 5.000 evra oženili kinesku državljanku?
- Brate, za te pare oženio bih Kineza!"

If you can't beat your computer at chess, try kickboxing.

- Muškarac ima dve glave, ali nema dovoljno krvi da u isto vreme razmišlja sa obe!

Our Father, who 0wnz heaven, j00 r0ck!
May all 0ur base someday be belong to you!
May j00 0wn earth just like j00 0wn heaven.
Give us this day our warez, mp3z, and pr0n through a phat pipe.
And cut us some slack when we act like n00b lamerz, just as we teach n00bz when they act lame on us.
Please don't give us root access on some poor d00d'z box when we're too pissed off to think about what's right and wrong, and if you could keep the fbi off our backs, we'd appreciate it.
For j00 0wn r00t on all our b0x3s 4ever and ever, 4m3n.

... and the aliens sent an android down to earth, to slow down mankind's development
... and they named it Bill Gates.

"We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them."

"Black holes are where God divided by zero."
- Steven Wright

Tvoji plodovi su zreli. Da li si ti zreo za svoje plodove?
Nice

[ypow]

( . Y . ) (.Y.) big or small I love real titties

BEER - Helping ugly people have sex since 1862

WARRANTY VOID WHEN BOUGHT

Covek je onoliko mlad koliko se oseca

MORALNO JE NEDOPUSTIVO DOZVOLITI NAIVCINAMA DA SACUVAJU SVOJ NOVAC. (Iz Marfijevog zakonika)

rasprava o DVD/divx player-ima: definitivno Yamaha, ipak je to brend imam dodus 470-ticu godinu ipo dana cita sve osim knjiga

Ljubi djecu žene svoje mozda je koje tvoje

Program koji radi ima 1000 mana a onaj koji ne radi samo jednu!

"Budimo ljudi, iako smo Srbi" - Patrijarh srpski gospodin Pavle

A problem is a chance for you to do your best

You have moved your mouse. In order to changes take effect, please restart your computer.

ne mogu me toliko malo platiti koliko ja mogu malo raditi

"Ako je kokain droga, onda sam ja narkoman." -Klaudio Kanidja

SVE je RELATIVNO sem:
- osnovnih konstanti svemira
- logike
...i ove tvrdnje

"Bolje je cutati i pustiti druge da misle da si glup, nego progovoriti i time otkloniti svaku sumnju." - Bernard Šo

He who dares, wins!

Dodji k sebi ako nemas kome.

... Warranty = Disclaimer


"Folk je narod, Turbo je sistem ubrizgavanja goriva pod pritiskom u cilindar motora sa unutrasnjim sagorevanjem. Turbo folk je gorenje naroda."

Bube ne pustaju ulje!One samo obelezavaju svoju teritoriju!

"This summer in cinemas .... tomorow in my room"

-...Partizani su deco nosili po dve tri atomske bombe o pojasu, i....
-Kako nosili atomske bombe profesiore???????
-Pa to su male bombe, atom,to je deco mala cestica....

Prica se da ako zavrtite DVD od nove Windows Viste naopako, cut cete sotonske stihove. No, to nije nista, jer ako ga zavrtite pravilno, instalirat ce se na vas kompjuter.

"My father always told me to watch my health not my money. One day someone took my money. It was my father."

Vampiros Lezbos VS Satanicum Demonicum

Heklam po svadbama, rodendanima, žurkama. Šifra: HEKLER

1."No matter how far down the wrong road you've gone, TURN BACK."
2.“No one can
make you feel inferior without your permission.”
3.Sve sto se ne dozivi nemoguce ga je istinski razumeti.

Um caruje dok snaga ne popi**i.
U zdravom telu zdrava pantljicara.
Kada postanem "normalan i prosecan" ubijte me, ne volim sam to da radim kazu da boli...

Svako je kovac svoje srece, ali ako kuješ svoju srecu ne udaraj blizu prstiju
Covek je rekao da je pas covekov najbolji prijatelj, ali pas ništa nije rekao

Skoci i reci "Dop!"

Pametan covek uci i zaboravlja,inteligentan se podseca,a glup sve zna.

Covek koji se razume u sale jedini moze da shvati ideale.

Mass murder ain’t just painless,
Now we’ve made it cute.

Abortus je ubistvo!
Masturbiranje je genocid!

Srednji prst je zastava kojom mašem kada sam ucutkan


"Voleo bih da je Bog živ da vidi ovo..."
Homer Simpson
Ima još par dobrih od doticne osobe...
"Za alkohol! Uzrok i rešenje svih životnih problema."
"Naravno da sve stvari izledaju loše kada ih se secaš."
"Internet sada imaju i na kompjuterima!"

Homer Simpson:

"If you really want something in life you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers."

"Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose: it's how drunk you get."

"Lisa, if the Bible has taught us nothing else - and it hasn't - it's that girls should stick to girls' sports, such as hot oil wrestling and foxy boxing and such and such."

"Stealing! How could you? Haven't you learned anything from that guy who gives those sermons at church? Captain whats-his-name? We live in a society of laws. Why do you think I took you to all those Police Academy movies? For fun? Well I didn't hear anybody laughin', did you?"

"Television - teacher, mother, secret lover!"

"When I held that gun in my hand, I felt a surge of power... like God must feel when he's holding a gun."

"I'm not normally a religious man. But if you're up there, save me, Superman!"

"If The Flintstones has taught us anything, it's that pelicans can be used to mix cement."

"You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'."


“Nisu svi ljudi tako rdjavi kao sto to rdjav covek misli.”
Ivo Andric

You can get expelled warning: Some kids have been kicked out of school just for bringing up a DOS prompt on a computer. Be sure to get a teacher's WRITTEN permission before demonstrating that you can hack on a school computer.

Pesimisti su optimisti sa iskustvom.

- To finish first, first you must finish -
- Diplomacy is how to say "Nice Doggie" while you look for a really big stick -

"Kada dodirnes reku,
dodirnuo su poslednju vodu koja dotice,
i prvu koja otice.
Isto je i sa vremenom"
Leonardo Da Vinci

I ain't a killer but don't push me! Revenge is like the sweetest joy next to gettin pussy

Movie Theater visitors, please do the bathroom business BEFORE the movie starts, have consideration for us, home TC movie viewers. Thank you !

Kids, don't buy drugs. Become a pop star, and they give you them for free.

- Volim nasu Pancevacku vodu pod nazivom SPC - Srkni pa crkni
- Sto vise znas, to vidis da vise ne znas - Nemojte uciti,jer cete se muciti

—Narode ako se ikada budem kandidovao za predsednika,molim vas glasajte za mene!
Otvoricu vam oci - ukinucu televiziju!!!
—Onaj ko hoce nesto da uradi,nadje nacin.Ko nece, nadje izgovor.
—Drugovi,stigle vase hulahopke.
—Gde macke nema, misevi punk sviraju!

Koliko god da vam je zivot ispunjen, uvek ima mesta za jedno pivo

Make love, not war.
...or get married and do both!!! ;)

¨People say that ¨money talks¨, but everything that money has ever said to me was goodbye¨
"Jednom ce biti bolje, ali taj jedan nikad necu biti ja."

Moj brat ninda... ce ti stavi dak na glavu nece vidiš ko te udara

ne mogu one biti toliko ruzne koliko ja mogu biti pijan

"Hi-Fi, Lo-Fi, No-Fi, it's all fine with me", ZZ Top

To je to! (sad mi kаže message too short! :D)

[Boris]

finooooo! nisam bash sve chitao, ali ima finih stvari! :)

[FreaK_]

ok ljudi ima finih forica ali nije stos copy/paste brdo stvari......citat koji gotivite i po kojem "zivite".....ot you try to

mada me je odusevio onaj sa citatima boga i nice-a : ].......

[ypow]

Generalno, ne živim ni po jednom citatu, a ove sam stavio jer mi se svi manje više svidjaju (ili su mi tada bili zanimljivi).

[whatareyoudoinginmyswamp]

dobar deo toga nisu tzitati wetj neke zaebantzije skinute sa neta,no nema weze...jedan od gotiwnijih tzitata...

iz filma Fear and loothing in Las Vegas
" One of the things you learn after years of dealing with drug people is that you can turn you back to a person,but never turn your back on a drug..."

a owo ne znam ko je rekao ...

"Zhiwi kao da ti je swaki dan poslednji"
"Radi drugima ono shto zhelish da se radi tebi"

a ewo nekih finih ...

-- Hector Berlioz
Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils.

-- Derek Bok
If you think education is expensive, try ignorance.

-- Will Durant
Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.

– Tryon Edwards
He that never changes his opinions, never corrects his mistakes, will never be wiser on the tomorrow than he is today.

-- Arthur Godfrey
Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.

--Hannibal (247-183 B.C.)
We will either find a way or make one.

-- John Hardwick
Don't do drugs because if you do drugs you'll go to prison, and drugs are really expensive in prison.

-- Herman Hesse
You must not give way to desires which you do not believe in

:)